Almost out of braces

Unlike Miriam, who still has another year or so to go in braces (and Zoë, who isn't in braces yet but will be as soon as she gets a few more adult head in her teeth because she has an impressive cross bite), I am almost out of braces.

My top teeth are technically finished...apparently...though I'm still wearing my old tray as a retainer of sorts. My bottom teeth still have a few months to go. I have one tooth that is particularly stubborn so I had to get some imaging redone today to get a new set of trays that will get that tooth on track. 

There's this one dental assistant that always (always) struggles to understand that I (still) can't put my teeth together...which is one of the big reasons I got braces in the first place. "They" say things like biting and chewing are important. 

Anyway, although even I (an untrained eye, if you will) can see huge improvements in my bite...this dental assistant is forever upset that...I can't put my teeth together. 

There's a meme right now that uses a song by a guy that turns "terrible tinder conversations into songs" and I thought my conversation today would go so well with the "I have one daughter" song. I'm not super "into" making video memes, so you'll just have to imagine my text over the original (like this or this or this; there are so many examples). 

Original Meme	My conversation
You have any kids?	Can you bite down for me?
Yes, I have one daughter, how about you?	Yes, but I can't close my teeth because I have an open bite. That's why I'm in braces.
How many baby daddies do you have if you don't mind me asking?	Okay, your teeth aren't touching. I just need you to bite down now.
Ellipsis	Ellipsis.
I have one daughter.	I have an open bite.
I understand and is she by the same father?	I understand but for imaging I need you to bite with your teeth together.
I have one daughter.	I have an open bite.
I understand and is she by the same father?	I understand but for imaging I need you to bite with your teeth together.
I don't understand.	I don't understand.

Anyway, she eventually agreed to take the picture without my teeth closing...on account of...I can't.