Lifelong teasing

Yesterday I was doing Phoebe's hair and asking her silly questions to help her keep still.

"Who is the cutest Phoebe in the world?" I asked. 

"Me!" she said proudly with a giggle.

"Who is the sweetest Phoebe in the world?"

"Me!"

"Who is the smartest Phoebe in the world?"

"Me!"

"Who is the goofiest Phoebe in the world?"

"You!"

"What—me?!" I objected. "But my name's not even Phoebe!"

"It is," Phoebe insisted.

"It is not!" I said. 

"It is," Phoebe explained, "It's just that no one has ever called you that because everyone has been teasing you for your whole entire life."

This is just the kind of joke she'd consider hilarious (she's been confusing Rachel and Miriam since she was about 6 months old...surely in part because she neglects to verify their identity entirely before saying their names, but also because she thinks it's funny—some days she'll switch them up entirely, other days she'll call them Rachel #1 and Rachel #2 or Miriam #1 and Miriam #6000). She's all about a good long-term prank.