One week

We have now been in Qatar for a week—and what a wild week it's been! 

On the one hand it's quite the relief to be here—to have all the waiting and preparation work over and done with. It's shiny and new and exciting and everything feels full of potential. We look out the windows at the twinkling skyscrapers surrounding us and think, "Wow! We did it! We're here!" 

But on the other hand, we (or at least I) find ourselves asking, "What. Have. We. Done?!" We used to know what life was like—it was a patterned, predictable, stable. And now...let's just say that I'm beginning to feel overwhelmed. 

So I thought perhaps was a good day to share pictures of our old home (as we contemplate what we need in a new home, which has so far been a rather major stressor for me). I still can't believe we managed to empty this house. 

Here's Benjamin in his room upstairs. Several children also have claim in this bedroom. I think Benjamin, Alexander, Zoë, and Phoebe all were in this room at some point, in various configurations:

Here's me in the main bedroom, which was ginormous and doubled as an office/nursery depending on the occasion:

Here's Phoebe and Alexander in the room they last shared together:

Again, many children were in here in various configurations. 

Here's Andrew working in the office on the main level:

And here's Zoë in the basement room she shared with Miriam (who used to share it with Rachel, back when Zoë was still an upstairs kid):

The little kids slept down here the last few weeks we were in this house (Phoebe really wanted to sleep under the desk...so we just let her):

And here's what we called the "main room" of the basement:

It had couches and bookshelves and desks and computers and a TV. I'm wondering if I should have done pictures of rooms prior to emptying out the house but...at least this way things are guaranteed to be somewhat tidy!

Here are the kids in the "LEGO room":

Pointing out our new home on the map:

Sitting in the reading loft:

The storage room (great for hide-and-seek):

Here's the TV room/den:

Here's the dining room, which our realtor thinks is super tacky:

The brightness of the green surprised us, too, but we were too tired to consider repainting. I did enjoy being surrounded by green though, I think. And—I've pointed this out before and will point this out again—Martha Washington chose a very bring green for her dining room and rather than acting like it was the blight of his house, Washington apparently "described the color green as 'grateful to the eye.'"

And the Mount Vernon website further describes the green walls as "striking." Intense? Perhaps. But definitely striking. 

Here are the kids by our trees (which our realtor also thinks are lame):

Honestly, it's fine. She can paint over them. The trees were always for us, anyway. 

She says that the smell of fresh paint is enticing to buyers and wanted us to paint the whole thing. But the quote we got was...too much. So she feels we should paint this green room and get rid of the whimsy. 

Which is fine. 

Although I think it might be better to paint over some of the areas of the house that haven't been painted since the 80s...or early 2000s...depending on which wall you're talking about.

Keep kids off this pony wall was a challenge:

Keeping the kids off this railing was a challenge:

Here's the music/family room fireplace:

And the windows on the other side of the room (the door that you see opens into Andrew' office space):

Here's the kitchen:

And a final little meal in our empty little tacky/whimsical/striking dining room:

Here's our yard nicely tidied up:

Grandma's bench and gargoyle that we left behind because we forgot to stick it on any of our shipments:

Our flight wasn't until 10:00 pm, but we had everything packed up and our house empty much earlier than that. The kids desperately needed something to do, so I told them to go use up some sidewalk chalk we had left by leaving love notes to the neighbourhood.

But to do so without getting super chalk-dusty because sometimes when they draw with chalk they come inside covered in chalk dust, looking like waifs...when I wanted them looking at least a tad respectable at the airport. They really did a good job using chalk with decorum.

Here's a view of our house, our little cottage, our Jolly Sinkhole:

We took this picture of the kids in front of the house with "QATAR OR BUST" in front...

And then Phoebe was like, "Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoever made the Qatar flag did it wrong. It needs to be maroon and white not maroon and black!"

Alexander had made the flag and figured that leaving the "white" part blank would be white enough, but since the pavement was black...this didn't sit well with Phoebe. So she coloured in the blank part white and felt much better after that.

Today was really a fine day. 

We went to church for the first time and met some wonderful people. We went to the bishop's house for dinner with a few other families. The kids had fun meeting new kids. 

We have another "playdate" planned for tomorrow. 

We're doing fine here.

But I've also reached the first (of what will be probably many—this is me we're talking about) hyperventilation moments, where I spiral out and question whether we've done the right thing at all or whether we should have stayed put.

Not that it matters, truly. 

Life doesn't have an undo button so the only way forward is through. So it's onwards and upwards and making the best from the point that we're at. There is no other option.

I know it will be fine (probably more than fine). But it also feels difficult and uncertain and overwhelming and so far away from so many people we love. 

So it's wonderful...and it's hard.

And I guess that's okay.

Enjoy this picture of my children saying goodbye to one of their best friends at the sacred green box, which I'm sure was as devastating for them to experience as it was for my momma heart to witness: