Resolutions

I recently had a discussion about resolutions with a friend, who said she doesn't make any (or encourage her children to make any) because if she wants to do something...she does...but that she doesn't feel the need to "be more" simply because it's a new year. Or something like that. 

On the one hand, I agree that it's important to feel valued for who you are in any given moment. But on the other hand, I think it's nice to have scheduled moments to contemplate who you are, where you are, what you want to be. 

At church, the sacrament is an example of a "temporal landmark," a time dedicated for contemplating my life—to consider whether I've misstepped or misspoke or misbehaved—and a time to begin anew—to recommit to living life a certain (higher) way. 

Not because I'm not "enough" as I am, but because I have such potential to...do and be...better.

The dawning of a new year offers a similar (but different) temporal landmark. And while I think goals can absolutely be started at any time, our brains really like these moments of "newness." We like the turning of the calendar page, the beginning of a new week, of a new year. We like anniversaries and birthdays and first days and...we just like landmark events. Setting goals in conjunction with a temporal landmark is shown to improve success/progress.

So at our house we talk about goals at the beginning of every year (and then have check-ins throughout the year), not to shame but to encourage. Doing so at the beginning of the year helps us be more mindful of those goals throughout the year. 

Alexander started a hat at some point last year. I don't know when. It was months ago. He'd knit a few rows and then put the project down for...weeks...and then knit a few rows...and then put the project down for a few weeks. It would lay forgotten on his dresser or on the staircase of his bed or behind the couch...

One of his resolutions was to finish his hat, and he approached that project with fresh determination, knitting row after row after row until...

He finally finished! 

Benjamin helped him make a pompom for the top.

He's been wearing it nonstop the past couple of days and is quite proud of his handiwork. He's thinking modifying his goal/resolution to finish that project by also making (and finishing) a hat for Phoebe. Because, as it turns out, finishing this hat wasn't as difficult as he thought.

He just needed a (metaphorical) kick in the pants.